Bind... Blind...

"The ties that bind can be the ties that blind."
"Monster"

Secrets

"You can't keep a secret about yourself and live a true life."
From the Judy-recommended movie "Little Secrets"

Financial Conversation

Ann House lists some questions to discuss together before you get married.
This will help you become aware of your own and your significant other's mindset, as well as feelings, about finances:

Understanding yourself and your other
is the first step towards success in financial management.

You will both be able to
be more co-operative and happy financially if you
understand first,
formulate a working document (budget) second and then
put your financial plans into action.

TO INCREASE UNDERSTANDING:

What and how did your family you grew up in SPEND money?
What and how have you been spending money? (etc... after each question)
This is what my family spent money on... (etc...)
What and how did your family SAVE money?
What were the FEARS in your family about money?
What were the FIGHTS about money in your family?
When you think about it... were your family actually RICH or POOR?
Did YOU feel rich or poor?
Name some things NOT FUN TO SPEND money on.
Name some things really FUN TO SPEND money on.
If you were given $10,000.00 how would you spend it?

Next questions to explore both of your sets of financial VALUES:

What is very important to you?
This is very important to me (etc...)
What is sort of important to you?
What is not very important to you?

Next set of questions are about your financial GOALS:

What are your short term (six months to a year or less) goals?
These are my short term goals (etc...)
What are your medium term (one to five years) financial goals?
What are your long-term financial goals?

Now... ask about your ALLOWANCES as a child:

What were you expected to pay for from your allowance?
This is what I was expected to spend my allowance on (etc...)
How did you use your allowance?

AND NOW THAT WE UNDERSTAND EACH OTHER MORE:

How will we FORMULATE our finances budget/s together?
How will we ENSURE that WE make our budget/s work for us?

Review your budget annually and more often as necessary.
How have we been doing?
What needs a tweak?
How do we do that?
What needs re-commitment to our values and our goals?
When will we next review our progress?

Useful free debt repayment calculator:
http://www.powerpay.org/

Thank you Ann House - interviewed on "Living Essentials", BYU Television
www.byutv.org

"How Expensive..."

"How expensive will this person be as a spouse?"

Are they financially expensive? Do they like to spend money...
Are they emotionally expensive? Do they need a lot of soothing, reassuring, counselling...
Are they spiritually expensive? Are they a spiritual person...
Are they intellectualy expensive? Will this relationship require a lot of intellectual explanations...
Are they vocationally expensive? Where are they in their career planning...
Are they physically expensive? Do they have unhealthy physical habits: eating, not exercising...
Are they musically expensive? How do our tastes in music compare...
Are they entertain-fully expensive? What sort of entertainment do they like...

How will they manage the (financial, emotional, spiritual and other) hard times that no doubt will come in the course of our lives together?

How expensive am I in these, and other ways, as a potential spouse?

Wedding Ceremony Planning

Don't cripple yourselves financially to have your grand dream wedding.
Face your financial realities.
Embrace your financial realities.
- From Dr Phil